I am Not Leader Material..

I’m not leader material.

It is a courageous person who states categorically what their strengths and weaknesses are without even a modicum of doubt.  I think the epitome of being human is to have doubts about some aspect of your life or indeed yourself.  I am a believer that doubt and fear can keep us on our toes, perhaps make some of us more cautious and some of us more daring.  So am I being angst-ridden or courageous when I say I’m not leader material?  I don’t yet know the answer to that!  I may do, by the time I have finished putting my thoughts on paper, but as yet I am not sure.  For the moment I know with utter certainty, I am not leader material.  I am good at what I do, I am professional, quick, talented (to a degree – and I’m not just blowing my own trumpet here) there is no shame in stating all of this – but I am not a good leader. I have very little patience for people who don’t work the way I work; hard and consistent!  I have very little patience for people who pretend to be dimmer than they actually are, in the hope of sliding through their work day or making someone else pick up their slack.  I also have no tolerance for those who believe they are better than everyone else and act as ‘bullies’ wanting always to take the best of everything on offer.  I would say I am a team player, but I also know at times I don’t play well with others.  That is the real dichotomy of my personality; I’m no leader, nor do I have any aspiration to be a follower.  My intolerance of others at times means I am not a good motivator.  I don’t have time for those who constantly need to get a ‘pat on the back’ to do their jobs.  I also know that to use yet another analogy, a carrot works much better than a stick, but my impatience is hard to disguise sometimes. So indeed I can de-motivate people very quickly purely by opening my mouth and saying exactly what is on my mind.  At times I am a good persuader, at times I can inspire and encourage, but for the most part I call it as I see it and that unfortunately is not the way to activate other peoples desires to do better, or work harder.

The contrasting side of this is that I am not really too good a follower either!  I’ve been in my particular business for close on two decades now and while I don’t know everything there is to know, I know a lot.  I am savvy and confident in my abilities and I don’t like taking ‘orders’.  I’m being very blunt here and I’m not sure what picture this paints of me at all?  Reading back, I don’t think I’d like to work with someone like me if I wasn’t me!!  I don’t really need to be motivated to do my work.  For the most part I enjoy what I do all the time.  I am lucky that way, in that I have a job I love, certainly there are elements of it I don’t, but for the most part, I am doing exactly what I want to do.  I am certain in my abilities, I think that just comes with age and experience.  I don’t need a lot of direction either or hands on management.  Just point me towards what you want and let me go at it!  So what does that leave then?  I am neither a leader nor a follower – When I was thinking about this piece what came to mind was a sketch from the Life of Brian by the Monty Python crew where Brian (the main character) stands at a window and talks to the crowd, telling them not to follow him, that they are all individual.  The street crowd agreed they were ‘All individuals’ in unison and one lone voice called out from the back ‘I’m Not’…    Perhaps this is me!  Just me – just individual!

A little bit of friendly banter can get you in hot water

A little bit of friendly banter can get you in hot water

What started out as a bit of office slagging at lunch hour has turned into a major event here at our office.  Let me digress for a moment and fill you all in!  When I’m at home, I love to cook, but I suppose my passion is for baking.  I enjoy the freedom of making something with what’s in the bakery press.  I go through supermarkets looking at the baking shelves and regularly buy ingredients just for the sake of having them and then deciding what to bake, instead of the other way round.  I’m no expert, let’s just get that straight from the off, but empty plates I believe are testament to a measure of skill in there somewhere!   We have had a student for the past four months who leaves us sadly at the end of April and I traditionally bake something for interns who are leaving; so, I asked him did he have a preference for anything in particular.  He suggested he bake for us, something German!  Now, I know that many a German in this country lament the seeming ‘lack’ of flavour in Irish food, so I had to hide a grin!  Nevertheless, we decided that we’d both make something and bring it in for the rest of the staff.  One of our guys then suggested that no matter what either of us baked, his carrot cake recipe could beat it.   And that is when the slagging began.  This particular chap is in love with M&S food; I swear he must have shares in the shop.  He is what we affectionately call ‘The Feeder’; he brings in lovely treats from time to time and refuses to eat them as he’s watching his figure.  Instead he sits there and watches us all devour the delights in minutes.  So of course when he mentioned actually baking, well, we all exploded in laughter, especially me.    That of course led on to retort after retort flying back and forwards getting progressively more outlandish until it was suggested that we have a ‘Bake-Off’.  Not to be too sure of myself, but I was happy with that.  “Bring it on”, said I.   Since then, however,  this little friendly competition among colleagues has morphed into a judging panel of all the staff with marks awarded out of 10; (signs are in the process of being made up!!), it also involves some backroom betting as to who will win.  While there is much remarking about the skill or otherwise of each of us, the dark horse of course is the intern, Christian, who remains stoically silent.  From time to time I catch him hiding a small grin and it is beginning to dawn on me that perhaps his quiet composure is a result of the fact he is really a fantastic baker!!  And there you have it..  The ‘Fabulous Bake Off’ takes place next week.  Of course that now means my weekend is going to have to involve practicing how to make the perfect cappuccino frosting, how to achieve the right coffee flavour along with a texture and consistency that will delight the palate of my co-workers and what to add in to this coffee and cappuccino masterpiece I intend to bake for next week that will tip the judging in my favour. I would not have described myself as an overly competitive person, but my friendly banter at lunch hour has certainly landed me in hot water and indeed brought out a desire in me to win.  I think however the real winners in all of this will be the rest of the staff who will have not one but three cakes as their treat at lunch next week…  Watch this space next issue and I’ll tell you who actually managed to garner the most votes!